you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
Randomize
