it was like eating out sand paper
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
Randomize
