it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
a search helicopter?!
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
Randomize