honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
if i can run in heels then i can drive
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
Randomize
