Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
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