Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
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