better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
A girl told me I was her "alcohol spirit animal" tonight. Somehow I think my whole life was secretly building up to this moment
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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