11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
Just got a blowjob from a coed in exchange for saving her an iPhone 5 when I get them in stock. Sometimes it's awesome to be a Verizon employee.
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
Randomize
