bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
