Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
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