Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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