Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
my phone vibrated itself into my puke bucket and literally sizzled. you'll have to reach me at this number for a while.
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
woke up to an unread text message i sent to myself: "brreakfdast..pork and ice cream."
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
Randomize
