He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
I just feel weird about accepting their wedding invite when I've got a post-engagement video on my phone of him jacking off in my bathroom.
Randomize
