problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
Sometimes you have a life bucket list item checked off like 4 tits in your face simultaneously and getting to bang them both. I'm sorry I bailed on skiing but not really. Coming over with a boombox playing 'heat of the moment' as soon as I can hail a cab cause I'm too drunk to drive still...
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
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