I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
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