Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
Randomize
