He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
First date. He's wearing a tuxedo shirt and keeps asking me about our future children. Escape plan #3 is now in action...
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
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