I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
Randomize