Rock
Scissors
Fuck
she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
I had to use the resin knife to take the staples out of my tax return forms. Tax returns and a search warrant?
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
