the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
Randomize
