how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
Actions speak louder than pants.
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
Randomize
