FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
mondays should just be called national damage control day
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
Randomize