maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
Randomize
