'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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