What a fucking waste of an outfit
if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
Randomize
