R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Randomize
