Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
PANTIES FOUND
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