Tell your broad to take a big shot of 'chill the fuck out' and put it on my tab.
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
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