Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
were you wearing a green and blue thong last night?
yes! wait why?
because i found it in my pocket this morning...
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
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