it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
New strategy for telling if someone is drunk: will they attempt to drink a candle if you put a straw in it?
Randomize
