Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
Randomize
