My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
i need to put some appletini on your dick
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
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