i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize
