Can Purell be used as lube?
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
my poor anus
Currently at a bar observing the mating patterns of drunken people in their 60s. This is hilariously terrifying. Hope he has Viagra.
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
Randomize