These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize
