If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
I'm surprised, it's been so long you must be starving
At a certain point, the zombie-like hunger goes away. Then the sadness sets in. Then you start lying to yourself that you're taking some "me time." Then you remember you dodged chlamydia and Buddha knows what else. Then you're at peace with it.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
Randomize
