Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
I had five suicidal voicemails from him when I woke up this morning. They all started and ended with "DON'T FUCK MY ROOMMATES".
It was only one, it doesn't count.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
You planned my entire going away party sitting in the bath tub cradling a bottle of Cuervo. You promised me fire jugglers. And a pinata.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
I'm a teacher who's always telling kids about the importance of due diligence, yet I'm eating an avocado out of a coffee filter because I'm too lazy to wash dishes
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