But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
I just got hit in the face by an old lady love handle.
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize
