So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
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