sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
3 things I learned last night: 1.) I'm not as light as I used to be. 2.) Sex on the roof of a convertible is a really bad idea. 3.) The hospital now has super glue pens for sealing minor cuts instead of stitches!
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
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