Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
She announced her abortion via fbk
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
Randomize