it's too hot outside to masturbate.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
I just got this text "hi this is Julie, I met you last night in the bathroom. You asked me to text you and remind you that you ate an entire lime, because you figured your sober self in the morning would be confused."
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
Randomize