she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
He uses pillows to masturbate.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
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