I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
my being single is dangerous.
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
I feel like I could be a daytime drinking legend, like they could put that shit on my tombstone and right now your preventing me from reaching my full potential
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Randomize