these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
Randomize
