yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
Randomize
