they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
I just inadvertently flirted with my coworker's 20-year old son. I've known him since he was 14, yet suddenly he looked different.
You are nothing if not reliable.
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Randomize
