no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
If you were a real friend you would have told me you saw me in a porno despite how awkward of a convo it is. You act like I should always know when I'm being recorded.
I could have made money off of that but no you had to wait 2 years to drunkenly tell me this shit.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
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