no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
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