did you get engaged???
you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
Randomize
